It’s been a while since I last updated this site. A million things have happened since.
Here’s just a brief timeline of what I can recall now:
1. Lehman’s collapse. No explanation required.
2. I left Lehman Brothers, wondering what lies ahead.
3. I signed a contract with a particular French firm, but did not start work there.
4. After some huge emotional debate, I had a 3 week break before starting work in Landesbank
5. I bought a car, a Daihatsu Copen.
6. I lost $14,000 in COE.
7. My CD player in the car is faulty, and I’ve had no time to send it for repairs.
8. I need to send my car for its first servicing soon; I see no time to run this many errands.
9. My car is the dirtiest 3-week old car you can ever imagine. I’m always tired so it’s never been washed. It’s getting disgusting.
10. I went to JB Palm Resort to play my 1st 18-hole, and it was disastrous: shoe gave way, buggy tyre punctured etc. You name it, we experienced it.
11. We held a dinner for grandma’s birthday last Saturday.
12. I feel sick today.

Today I feel so wrong about so many things. Melvin just sent me a message and got me thinking that it might not be that bad staying in Lehman-Nomura after all. Or the French firm that’s still in town. I feel so far away from civilization and the daily traveling and traffic jams is taking its toll on me. I just go home and come to work everyday and everyday I have zero ounces of energy left.

Working here is a daily battle. If Lehman was a fright, this place is a horror movie. I’ve not a day in office without deadlines, meetings, discussions and audit. And it’s only my 7th day in office today. My table is overflowing and I’ve tones of management reports to review and submit. Senior management meetings are somber and intense. People are stoic and highly strung up and aggressive no less. I’ve had a couple so far, and I’m not even going to bring up my issues with the MAS Inspection report, Head Office MaRisk audit, Seoul and Tokyo branch issues, procedural manuals, approvals to give, endless planning, budgeting, training, etc etc etc….

Maybe it’s a mistake. I should not have bought my car and started work here.
It feels wrong. I lost so much $ and I feel zapped out.

Oh God please come and save me.