I have to perform a self evaluation on whether I’m frequently upset... and if yes, why so?

Today, I feel glum and blue. Disappointed and upset with the imperfect world and how flawed my life can be. But just as I was going to wade in my stagnant pool of self-pity, I came to terms that nothing is EVER going to change. People will remain the way they are, let you down and leave you one day or another. Murphy’s Law always plays up when you least expect it to. Choke-ups will happen at the eleventh hour. There will be days when you feel helpless, alone and no longer invincible. Other days you’ll wish you had someone to turn to but realize that all you’ve got is yourself to depend on. Strength is vital; and endurance is essential for survival.

I should be looking up to my Father in Heaven. After all, he created all things and nothing is too difficult for Him. I wish it could be that easy; but I’m human after all. If I could do what I’m supposed to all the time, I would have achieved Sainthood a long time ago.

I told myself to forget about the whole December affair. I will try, and even I fail, it’s not going to be as intense as it is now. As the dust settles, the castle in the mirage doesn’t look as grand anymore…

On the other hand, January wasn’t all bad… I did some cool stuff, like going for my first spin class, hot yoga class, my Cue agency dinner, caught up with some old friends and will be going through a supposedly ‘painful procedure’ this Sunday. Don’t worry; it’s not anything drastic or any big deal… just something I’m going to try out for the first time. Excited, and a bit nervous.

Aunt Jennifer fell really sick unexpectedly this month... but her fighting spirit is truly admirable. I thank God for good health. I'm also thankful for my bonus, because it's truly His blessing.

Well, I guess I'll feel better soon. Evy is a strong girl, and won't be defeated so easily.